Day 7: Who Do I Pretend to Be Around Certain People?

I’ve spent most of my life shifting myself to match whoever I’m around. People have pointed it out for years, and honestly, they’re right. I can be quiet and mature with some, then loud and goofy with others. With certain people, I slip into being rude or gossipy, while with others I’m the empathetic listener who seems to have endless patience.

It’s not that any of these versions are fake. They’re all real pieces of me, but the way they surface depends entirely on the room I’m in. I’ve always had this deep, incessant need to fit in, to be liked, to be accepted. Pair that with a shaky sense of self, and you get a chameleon: someone who adapts so quickly and so completely that it becomes second nature.

Being this way is both a blessing and a curse. It helps me make friends easily because I can match energy, tone, humor, and emotional needs without thinking. But I struggle to keep those friendships long-term, because I’m constantly feeding off other people’s energy instead of grounding myself in my own. It’s exhausting to maintain, and confusing to untangle.

I’m learning that adapting isn’t inherently bad, but losing myself in the process is. Naming it is the first step. Understanding it is the second. And slowly, I’m figuring out who I am when I’m not mirroring someone else.